Imagine, if you will, going shopping. As you pass by a group of people, they glance in your direction and suddenly you have no idea why but you feel defensive. Maybe it was their tones, maybe it was their body language, but you don't like those people.
Enter Facebook, Twitter, Google+, or other social mediums. You're going to vent because the internet is anonymous, you can put up anything you want. After all, it's not like those people in the store will ever know what you put up... You start to post particularly judgmental things. Everyone sees it who you know. Some respond in an equally judgmental fashion, and you feel justified and soothed because other people feel the same way you do.
This is called cyber-bullying.
How many of us have spent time struggling over our own self-worth? I know I have. I never quite "matched up" to the expectations of others. When I think of my three older siblings, I tend to compare myself to them and their successes. I was never as smart or strong or quick witted. In fact, I was the "dull one", the "project". I was special because I was not - if you get my meaning.
This is called cyber-bullying.
How many of us have spent time struggling over our own self-worth? I know I have. I never quite "matched up" to the expectations of others. When I think of my three older siblings, I tend to compare myself to them and their successes. I was never as smart or strong or quick witted. In fact, I was the "dull one", the "project". I was special because I was not - if you get my meaning.
So I know all about low self-esteem, and devaluing my own self-worth. We all spend so much time criticizing ourselves that we really don't need other people to help with that.
So why do we allow ourselves to tear on other people...? Whether it is based off their appearance (structurally or via use of garments and accessories), or some other facet of their being, do they not have the human right to feel good about themselves? Perhaps we feel entitled to feel better than others, so we must bring them down? Or perhaps we feel bad our own selves and when we see someone better, or happier, we self-consciously need to sabotage them...?
Whatever internet medium you go on, whether it is Reddit, or Facebook, or Youtube, you end up finding stinging comments from other users. "In my opinion" and "In my humble opinion" is a ready-made fall-back for people to say whatever it is they feel like saying without that pesky guilt nagging in their gut. And by saying it, others will be more likely to excuse the whole comment by accepting it as an "opinion".
Well, I'm here, on the internet. I'm not anonymous, but I want to say to all those people who tear others down for one reason or another that your opinions should be kept to yourself. Stop insulting people and hiding behind the shroud of the opinion. You may feel free to have views other than the rest of us, but if your views are cruel and unjust, or hurtful to others, then you really need to hold your tongue.
At times, I have seen people posting on the internet some very crude comments about others. Upon questioning about the rudeness of those comments, I have received the, "It's just my opinion," speech countless times. In addition, I've been flat out told said people, "don't want to continue to discuss the subject." In my opinion, I feel these people are afraid to discuss the morally right and wrong about it because they don't want to realize they're incorrect. And yes, that is my opinion. Feel free to call me on it, if my opinion is an insult. I'll curb my tongue.
Everyone is beautiful, and in my opinion, no one should be allowed to drag you down.
So next time you feel defensive over something someone else says, or does, or looks, or however you end up wanting to gain divine retribution against them, perhaps you can think of how judgmental you are of yourself. Remember that the internet shouldn't be where you put every thought you ever had, because the internet is far more eternal. What is said cannot be unsaid, whether that is in reality, or on cyberspace.
Just because you're anonymous, or the person may not ever see your comment, or know who you are, does not mean that you are not a cyber bully when you attempt to harass or humiliate others online.
As a response to an increase in cyber bullying witnessed on a daily basis about people and appearances, I'll be continuing this blog post with a supplement on "double standards and media portrayed perfection, and how these influence opinions".
Let me know what you think of this in the comments. Please feel free to mention the abuse of commas.
©2014 Jaimie Gross
So why do we allow ourselves to tear on other people...? Whether it is based off their appearance (structurally or via use of garments and accessories), or some other facet of their being, do they not have the human right to feel good about themselves? Perhaps we feel entitled to feel better than others, so we must bring them down? Or perhaps we feel bad our own selves and when we see someone better, or happier, we self-consciously need to sabotage them...?
Whatever internet medium you go on, whether it is Reddit, or Facebook, or Youtube, you end up finding stinging comments from other users. "In my opinion" and "In my humble opinion" is a ready-made fall-back for people to say whatever it is they feel like saying without that pesky guilt nagging in their gut. And by saying it, others will be more likely to excuse the whole comment by accepting it as an "opinion".
Well, I'm here, on the internet. I'm not anonymous, but I want to say to all those people who tear others down for one reason or another that your opinions should be kept to yourself. Stop insulting people and hiding behind the shroud of the opinion. You may feel free to have views other than the rest of us, but if your views are cruel and unjust, or hurtful to others, then you really need to hold your tongue.
At times, I have seen people posting on the internet some very crude comments about others. Upon questioning about the rudeness of those comments, I have received the, "It's just my opinion," speech countless times. In addition, I've been flat out told said people, "don't want to continue to discuss the subject." In my opinion, I feel these people are afraid to discuss the morally right and wrong about it because they don't want to realize they're incorrect. And yes, that is my opinion. Feel free to call me on it, if my opinion is an insult. I'll curb my tongue.
Everyone is beautiful, and in my opinion, no one should be allowed to drag you down.
So next time you feel defensive over something someone else says, or does, or looks, or however you end up wanting to gain divine retribution against them, perhaps you can think of how judgmental you are of yourself. Remember that the internet shouldn't be where you put every thought you ever had, because the internet is far more eternal. What is said cannot be unsaid, whether that is in reality, or on cyberspace.
Just because you're anonymous, or the person may not ever see your comment, or know who you are, does not mean that you are not a cyber bully when you attempt to harass or humiliate others online.
As a response to an increase in cyber bullying witnessed on a daily basis about people and appearances, I'll be continuing this blog post with a supplement on "double standards and media portrayed perfection, and how these influence opinions".
Let me know what you think of this in the comments. Please feel free to mention the abuse of commas.
©2014 Jaimie Gross
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